Oh my goodness. My heart pounds, my eyes flutter, and I begin to moan uncontrollably when reminiscing on my many encounters with this stellar Nabisco product. My father tells me stories of how he used to feed me Wheat Thins when I was still a tiny baby. Well, more like allow me to lick the tantalizing salts and 100% whole grain surface of the cracker. As I grew, I continued to gravitate towards the product's perfect crisp, light savory taste, and unparalleled stacking ranking (as one places more food in one's mouth, the enjoyment of said food increases exponentially) that combine to make a nearly immaculate snack.
Sun and moon. Coffee and cream. Husband and bride. Wheat Thins and me. We are simply destined to be together. One of my only wishes in life is to cross paths with the inventor of the Wheat Thin so that I may humble myself before him and kiss the ground before his feet until his burly bodyguards are forced to carry my unworthy body away. I've been known to uncontrollably gorge on boxes of Wheat Thins at a time, and my day would not be complete without at least a trip or two to what I like to call Snack Heaven.
My single-day record is 21 boxes (about 3000 crackers).
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